goodbye nursing


I stopped nursing and pumping in September and realized that I didn’t even blog about it, does that count as a sin?!? Lets be honest though, I have not been blogging about much lately. My recent trip to Mexico provided me with some time to use the computer while Mario was napping so I am getting to update the blog and program a few posts for the next couple weeks!

But back to nursing… I struggled with nursing initially and considered quitting at about six weeks in because it was so horrible. Read more about that here. But for whatever reason: peer pressure/ societal pressure/ family pressure, I stuck with it and was happy that I did. I was never a high producer and we were supplementing regularly with formula, Honest Co. to be exact, from about two months onward.

Going back to work after four and a half months of maternity leave, I brought the pump to the office and was pretty good about visiting the lactation room two to three times a day for the first couple months. Once travel picked up for work I made sure to have a dedicated space on shoots where I could pump and have a mini fridge rolled into my room so I could store the milk I was making. Waking up in the middle of the night from my king size hotel bed to pump was not something I looked forward to but it was completely necessary due to the nature of milk production.

My supply started to decrease as my schedule got busier at work and two key trips away from Mo had a big effect. The first being six days in Mexico City. I had my dedicated room to pump between meetings but inconsistency and no Mo definitely hurt my supply. The next month, without travel, he began to wean. The lack of milk production was noticeable for me but I continued to see what we could do. I had stopped pumping at work, as this my low supply allowed me not to and would feed him once I got home from work and during the nights. Nighttime feedings were much easier when you didn’t have to have a bottle at the ready!

The first week of September I had another trip for work. I brought my pump along but over the three nights I only managed to squeeze out one ounce of milk the first night and nothing else the rest of the week. Once I got home I let Mario decide, he had lost all interest in my chest. There was nothing there for him and he knew it. I felt relief but also an honest realization that this time was over for us he was moving on from being a little dependent baby.

Now two months later, Mo is eating so much real food and drinking bottles throughout the day. At night I have an 8oz bottle prepared for him, he tends to restless around 4AM, we bring it to him in his crib and he dozes back off to sleep for another few hours. As for my breasts, they are back to being normal- non-lactating breasts. I cannot say they are back to the same because I honestly do not remember their size or shape prior. They got so much attention the past year that my memory has been altered. The definitely feel deflated compared to their milk producing days but I would say they are still cute, if you like little B cups.

xx Ly